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 Post subject: Re: gluttony
PostPosted: 13 May 2016, 14:55 
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free donuts at the office today, picked this plastic-looking thing because homer

it tastes better than it looks, the story of my food


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 Post subject: Re: gluttony
PostPosted: 16 May 2016, 01:39 
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my son loves cheeseburgers, when we go out for cheeseburgers he calls it a burger party, so i decided that every weekend that i have him, i'd take him around my favorite burger places in philly. we're calling it burger tour. today we went to village whiskey, maybe my 2nd or 3rd favorite in philly. we had the standard cheeseburger there with cheddar and thousand island sauce, with a side of duck fat fried french fries with short ribs and cheese over top. he was thrilled. here is a picture of the table setting before the food arrived.
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we stopped at insomniac cookies for dessert.


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 Post subject: Re: gluttony
PostPosted: 03 Aug 2016, 05:08 
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^Recently purchased a jar of duck fat and have been wantonly substituting it for butter.

Here is a bit more Barthelme. I like to imagine him, inspired, composing this on a napkin in front of a particularly lacklustre spread at some dreary seminar.

We've all been at dinners like this.

Quote:
I was preparing a meal for Celeste—a meal of a certain elegance, as when arrivals or other rites of passage are to be celebrated.

First off there were Saltines of the very best quality and of a special crispness, squareness, and flatness, obtained at great personal sacrifice by making representations to the National Biscuit Company through its authorized nuncios in my vicinity. Upon these was spread with a hand lavish and not stinting Todd's Liver Pate, the same having been robbed from geese and other famous animals and properly adulterated with cereals and other well-chosen extenders and the whole delicately spiced with calcium propionate to retard spoilage. Next there were rare cheese products from Wisconsin wrapped in gold foil in exquisite tints with interesting printings thereon, including some very artful representations of cows, the same being clearly in the best of health and good humor. Next there were dips of all kinds including clam, bacon with horseradish, onion soup with sour cream, and the like, which only my long acquaintance with some very high-up members of the Borden company allowed to grace my table. Next there were Fritos curved and golden to the number of 224 (approx.), or the full contents of the bursting 53 cent bag. Next there were Frozen Assorted Hors d'Oeuvres of a richness beyond description, these wrested away from an establishment catering only to the nobility, the higher clergy, and certain selected commoners generally agreed to be comers in their particular areas of commonality, calcium propionate added to retard spoilage. In addition there were Mixed Nuts assembled at great expense by the Planters concern from divers strange climes and hanging gardens, each nut delicately dusted with a salt that has no peer. Furthermore there were cough drops of the manufacture of the firm of Smith Fils, brown and savory and served in a bowl once the property of Brann the Iconoclast. Next there were young tender green olives into which ripe red pimentos had been cunningly thrust by underpaid Portuguese, real and true handwork every step of the way. In addition there were pearl onions meticulously separated from their nonstandard fellows by a machine that had caused the Board of Directors of the S&W concern endless sleepless nights and had passed its field trials just in time to contribute to the repast I am describing. Additionally there were gherkins whose just fame needs no further words from me. Following these appeared certain cream cheeses of Philadelphia origin wrapped in costly silver foil, the like of which a pasha could not have afforded in the dear dead days. Following were Mock Ortolans Manques made of the very best soybean aggregate, the like of which could not be found on the most sophisticated tables of Paris, London and Rome. The whole washed down with generous amounts of Tab, a fiery liquor brewed under license by the Coca-Cola Company which will not divulge the age-old secret recipe no matter how one begs and pleads with them but yearly allows a small quantity to circulate to certain connoisseurs and bibbers whose credentials meet the very rigid requirements of the Cellarmaster. All of this stupendous feed being a mere scherzo before the announcement of the main theme, chilidogs.

"What is all this?" asked sweet Celeste, waving her hands in the air. "Where is the food?"

"You do not recognize a meal spiritually prepared," I said, hurt in the self-love.

"We will be very happy together," she said. "I cook."


Damn. I wanna chilidog.

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 Post subject: Re: gluttony
PostPosted: 04 Aug 2016, 02:08 
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^hahah

Ah, duck fat on toast! I loved duck fat so much for everything, sauteeing vegetables, poaching sunny-side up eggs, just whatever. That brings back memories now, the times when I'd render beef or pork fat and seal up rillettes or confit; let buttermilk sour to creme fraiche and whip that into butter; roast bones, trim chickens feet, and skim stock; grind sausages and process pates; and then this was my favorite:

phpBB [video]


Cooking is a brutal activity, but that is just so fucking savage. Back then, I'd always enjoyed cooking more than eating, I'm not sure what that says about me. And now I live alone and have adopted a vegan diet, so I have no occasion to do such things anymore; that was all from the before time.

I really switched to veganism mostly for the carbon footprint aspect of it, but somehow I can't have meat in my mouth anymore (har har). I thought I could be an occasional meat eater, but it messes with me psychologically, that fleshy texture, I can't deal. People change, tastes change.

So now I just eat whatever is convenient and nutrient rich. Tonight's dinner was Trader Joe's (shoutout to merz fits) organic split pea soup from a box. I didn't even bother heating it up, just mashed it into a better consistency with my spoon. I guess this is what divorce tastes like.

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 Post subject: Re: gluttony
PostPosted: 09 Sep 2016, 05:03 
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Never actually watched any Jacques Pepin before. The man's voice and assurance mesmerize. The night you posted this I wound up trawling yt for a good hour.

Me, I just buy chicken breasts, love mammalian but not avian bones.

Here is one to water the collective mouths of any good turophiles:

This peculiar cheese—known as caligù or su callu, depending on whom you talk to—is one of Sardinia’s lesser-known but more ubiquitous specialties. It’s also one of the most primal dairy products you’ll encounter in the modern world. Upon killing a kid, a farmer simply takes its milk-filled stomach, ties it off in a tight knot or sews it shut, perhaps covers it in mesh to keep the flies off, then hangs it from the ceiling of a cool, dark room. He then waits for a few months until the natural rennet within curdles and hardens the milk into a thick, creamy cheese and desiccation tightens the gut into a pungent, leathery rind.

http://roadsandkingdoms.com/2015/the-secret-life-of-cheese/

For all the article's eloquence and mouthwatering imagery, it strangely doesn't have any pictures of the, ahem, chevre-d'oeuvre, but google rescued us.

Image

(It's only because I just reread the whole 1+1=3 thread, but it looks entirely like a model for the embryo bag.)

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PostPosted: 25 Feb 2017, 17:22 
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I don't have a mustache, but if I did, it would do this whenever I ate good chocolate

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(via Atlas Obscura)

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 Post subject: Re: gluttony
PostPosted: 23 May 2017, 07:34 
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Quote:
Bake at 350 degrees for 30 to 32 minutes. Test corners to see if done, as center will seem like the next horror of Second House.

Whip ½ pint of heavy cream. Add 4 Tbsp. brandy or rum to possibly open things that will never be wholly reported.

Cook over a hot grill, or over glowing remains of tunnel mouth.

With blender on high speed, add ice cubes, one at a time, making certain each cube is the end.

Dice the pulp of the eggplant and put it in a bowl with the vast stark rocks.

NOTE: As this is a tart rather than a cheesecake, you should be disturbed.

Here’s what you get when you give incomplete cookbook recipes to a neural network trained on the complete works of H. P. Lovecraft

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 Post subject: Re: gluttony
PostPosted: 25 May 2017, 05:36 
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MJRH wrote:
Quote:
Bake at 350 degrees for 30 to 32 minutes. Test corners to see if done, as center will seem like the next horror of Second House.

Whip ½ pint of heavy cream. Add 4 Tbsp. brandy or rum to possibly open things that will never be wholly reported.

Cook over a hot grill, or over glowing remains of tunnel mouth.

With blender on high speed, add ice cubes, one at a time, making certain each cube is the end.

Dice the pulp of the eggplant and put it in a bowl with the vast stark rocks.

NOTE: As this is a tart rather than a cheesecake, you should be disturbed.

Here’s what you get when you give incomplete cookbook recipes to a neural network trained on the complete works of H. P. Lovecraft


That's amazing. I love her work in general, e.g. http://lewisandquark.tumblr.com/post/15 ... al-network


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 Post subject: mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
PostPosted: 23 Jun 2017, 19:20 
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Huysmans, once again, wrote:
...the plates and the ewers filled with water of medlar, rose, and melilote for washing the hands, were placed on credences. Gilles ate beef-, salmon-, and bream-pies; levert- and squab-tarts; roast heron, stork, crane, peacock, bustard, and swan; venison in verjuice; Nantes lampreys; salads of briony, hops, beard of judas, mallow; vehement dishes seasoned with marjoram and mace, coriander and sage, peony and rosemary, basil and hyssop, grain of paradise and ginger; perfumed, acidulous dishes, giving one a violent thirst; heavy pastries; tarts of elder-flower and rape; rice with milk of hazelnuts sprinkled with cinnamon; stuffy dishes necessitating copious drafts of beer and fermented mulberry juice, of dry wine, or wine aged to tannic bitterness, of heady hypocras charged with cinnamon, with almonds, and with musk, of raging liquors clouded with golden particles—mad drinks which spurred the guests in this womanless castle to frenzies of lechery and made them, at the end of the meal, writhe in monstrous dreams.

dayumn

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